Step Into the Bieber

Justin Bieber – LA (Kevin Winter/Getty Images)

It all started in Long Beach. During a setbreak conversation, a friend told me that Justin Bieber was the show and had stood right next to her at the soundboard for much of the set. “Interesting,” I thought. I had heard of Justin Bieber. He was the teen-aged idol of today’s generation of young girls; a teen pop star through and through. I had never heard a lick of his music, but I thought it was cool that the kid came to the LBC to see Phish. After the show, more information came out. Bieber’s guitarist, Dan Kanter, was a huge Phish fan and had brought Bieber and his girlfriend, Selena Gomez (who I had never heard of) to the show that night. The trio had met the band during setbreak and hit it off while talking music. Then more. Since Phish had no plans for fall tour, Chris Kuroda would be designing the light show for Bieber’s upcoming tour (!), which was one of the reasons Kanter brought him to the show. Over the next couple of days, there was some confusion in the Phish community—was Kuroda actually going in tour with Canada’s pretty boy, or was he just designing the lighting schemes? It soon came out that Kuroda would actually hit the road on Bieber’s “Believe” tour while Phish spent time with their families and solo projects. Taking his Jedi-like skills to the most mainstream act around, CK5 would now see how the other half lived, all while lighting up the minds and imaginations of teeny-boppers across the land. Kuroda worked for The Black Crowes, Aerosmith and R. Kelly during Phish’s haitus, but this would mark his most crossover effort to date. Once everyone figured out the truth of the matter, laughter prevailed in community, but Bieber Fever went into remission as Phish went on to crush the second leg of tour.

Bieber and Kuroda Light Up Los Angeles (Jeff Kravitz)

Fast forward to last week when Bieber’s North American tour kicked off in the southwestern states. In scrolling my Twitter feed, I noticed YEMBlog had posted a short piece about Kanter teasing “Divided Sky” in a live show! “Cute,” I thought, but certainly didn’t think anything of it. And I didn’t even bother to check the clip. In addition, the short piece mentioned that Kanter had also threw in a tease of “Fluffhead’s” “Bundle of Joy” section in a different song! Apparently, Kanter and Kuroda were having some fun while getting paid. It’s doubtful if Justin, himself, let alone the thousands of prepubescent girls in the audience, knew anything of the musical trickery.

Kanter and Bieber (Jeff Kravitz)

Then yesterday, the Phish Internet exploded with Bieber talk. Kanter had worked in significant sections of “Sand” and “First Tube” into Bieber’s show! Several websites had written up the entertaining blurb (all which contained priceless comments from a mix of Bieber and Phish fans.) This time I checked the clips. Amidst a more “grown up” part of the show that flashed images of street action and aggressive music, Kanter sure enough tore right into the themes of “Sand” and “First Tube!” It was not subtle. To see Bieber running and dancing around in a multi-million dollar, mega-production to Trey’s melodies was just too hilarious for words. I immediately retweeted the clips to my followers as I watched and laughed. Kanter had taken the prankster spirit of Phish and wove it right into one of the cheesiest shows on the planet! And I can only imagine the shit-eating grin on the guitarist’s face, let alone Kuroda’s, as he did so.

Biebs In Action (Jeff Kravitz)

I jokingly Tweeted to Kanter, “When are you gonna drop “Tweezer” licks in a Bieber show?” Within a minute, YEMBlog responded that Kanter had already posted on Phantasy Tour that “Tweezer” was coming next! My mental response was a fusion of “WHAAAT?!?” and “That’s fuckin’ awesome!” Within minutes, a multi-party conversation started with people making all sorts of Phish/Bieber jokes, primarily focused on the absurd possibility of a Bieber-focused gag on New Year’s Eve. I suggested that Tom Marshall would be announced as Bieber as he descended from the rafters of MSG at midnight with the goth-angel outfit that Beiber has worn for the same stunt to kick off each and every show. Marshall responded, suggesting he would be introduced wearing an overcoat onstage only to have Bieber shed the costume and appear on stilts to sit in with Phish as the clock struck twelve! Everyone was in on the humor! But then people started worrying about Phish embracing the Biebs too much. “Really?” I thought. Fans were actually concerned that Bieber’s fans—and more particularly his music—would cross over to Phish. Now this seemed a bit absurd. Perhaps the guys work a Bieber allusion into a New Year’s joke or tease a pop song in jest, but theories hypothesizing the potential of Justin singing with Phish felt a bit too ridiculous for me. But, hey, he’d probably pull it off far better than Kid Rock did! The bottom line is “Who Cares?!” But for those sweating it out, the Canadian heartthrob is off for New Year’s Eve!

Regardless if the pop star ever steps foot Phish’s stage, I really don’t see an influx of fourteen year old girls and their parents infiltrating the Phish scene. Nor do I see Bieb’d out setlists as even a remote possibility. But to see fans began to sour over the potential was enough for another personal chuckle. Would some Bieberheads get turned on to Phish? Probably. Is that a bad thing? Hell no! But regardless of fan crossover, the real humor here is that Phish music that will continue to be woven into Bieber’s upcoming concerts! While the band is off tour, the question every morning will now be,” What songs did Kanter dropped on the domes of 20,000 unknowing teens last night?” And we will all sit back and laugh. Shit, if you were a Phish fan playing guitar for Justin Beiber, wouldn’t you do the same thing? I know I would.

8.15.12 Long Beach (John Florek)


Jam of the Day:

Tweezer” 8.17.97 I, Limestone, ME

Something groovilicious for any potential Bieberites stopping by.

[audio:] Tags: ,

403 Responses to “Step Into the Bieber”

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  1. Henry Says:

    Great piece

  2. MiA Says:

    If Bieberites are stopping by, may I suggest an amuse bouche of “Heavy things” or “bouncing around the room?”

  3. jdub Says:

    Beiber fever is spreading to the Phish world. So funny. Great to hear Kuroda is having a good time. Just seems like a painful experience to sit through a Beiber show, let alone a whole tour. I’m sure a nice payday though.

  4. vegas wolfmans Says:

    “goth angel outfit” ftw.

  5. Chonz Says:

    I’ve been waiting for this post.

  6. mmmhmm Says:

    Nice work Miner. Adding a little fuel to the already ridiculous Bieber fire.

  7. Guyute711 Says:

    Phish should demand some of that Beibs cash.

  8. viola Says:

    this beiber fever is exactly what down with disease is talking about. i for one embrace the weirdness that is. a teen pop idol mixing it up with the music of phish… its ridiculous if not insane, but this does strike at the heart of music and its boundless crossover appeal. music is universal and the best part… the waterwheel beiber prints i got are now priceless.

    limestone tweezer at my funeral please

  9. PigSong Says:

    Completely agree on with your take Mr M. Folks need to embrace the easy going prankster spirit of all things Phish. (not that I actually want to tell you how to enjoy Phish irl)

  10. SillyWilly Says:

    Morning, kids

    way to capture the humor involved, Mr. Miner.

    I think the word “prankster” sums it up perfectly.

  11. Phamily Berzerker Says:

    Silly is a person. People are silly. Silly is everyone.

    In a year’s time what will matter of any of this?

    Silly will still be a person.

  12. sumodie Says:

    What if Phish fans start going to Bieber shows instead? That could be catastrophic to our community. Imagine Huggiebear becoming Huggabiebs? This shit ain’t funny

  13. Type III Jamming Personality Disorder Says:

    love that laid back great went tweezer. funkier than a mosquito’s tweeter, to borrow a turn of phrase…

    it starts with the teases
    then he decides to cover a song
    then he does a club remix jam
    soon after comes the music video
    combined with the today show taping
    followed by the sit-in on new year’s eve
    before the inevitable album collaboration
    and dual headliner world tour extravaganza

    you know it, just just haven’t admitted it to yourself yet 😯

  14. voopa Says:

    The MVP on the technical side was Phish lighting director Chris Kuroda, who made the whole of Oracle Arena look and feel like the inside of a pinball machine. Excellent work.

  15. voopa Says:

    The curator of went to Beib’s show at the Rose Garden last night.

  16. kayatosh Says:

    Bieber posts on here under the name Poop Goblin.

  17. Theturbo1974 Says:

    I could see Trey teasing a Bieber tune…what is the difference between Bieber and Michael Jackson? I think it would be great…true phish!!

  18. Theturbo1974 Says:

    I could see Trey teasing a Bieber tune…what is the difference between Bieber and Michael Jackson? I think it would be great…true phish!!

  19. voopa Says:

    LLFA@ kaya!

    “Phish fans are the lamest, whitest cats on the face of the planet. Excuse me…

  20. MiA Says:

    I bet Dan reads this page.

    Dan, buy Miner’s book!

    What if Bieber covers Harpua and plays a vacuum onstage?

  21. sumodie Says:

    What if Mr. Miner starts a Biebs blog?

  22. DaNcInG fOoL Says:


  23. Doctor MYFE. Says:

    What if Miner IS the Bieb?
    ::cortex disintegrates ::

  24. Robear Says:

    The irony of the least original artist currently alive, covering the most original artists left playing, can not escape me.


  25. Dorn76 Says:

    Hell yes Miner!

    Phish: Opening Minds Since 1983

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